Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Where's Everybody Else?

Here are 10 other things that I think you may be doing:

1) Watching American Idol Premiere Week and wishing you had Ryan Seacrest's eyes.

2) Catching up on New Adventures of Old Christine re-runs.

3) Thumbing through the new Kohls catalog, getting yourself an erection and then asphixiating yourself as you jerk off.

4) Eating a lot of cabbage.

5) Looking for Omar with Chris and Marlo. (a full The Wire post will be coming, I promise)

6) Putting in extra time with Danny Ainge to try and find a team that he can unload Tony Allen on in exchange for somebody with I don't know, basketball skills.

7) Arguing over the merits of Juno as a movie. Was it really that good or just a cute throwaway movie that got some great early buzz and then rode the PR wave to a status well beyond it's capacity. It's weird to think that a movie such as that would be so polarizing, but it seems to me that the above are the two distinct trains of thought regarding the film and people on both sides love to vehemently argue their case. At least I do, and count me as a member of the "cute, throwaway" faction.

8) Pondering on what would happen if Peter King, Brett Favre, Peter Gammons, and Greg Maddux ever hung out in a room together, just the four of them with a few bottles of blush and some vicodins for Favre? I'm not sure. Part of me thinks orgy while the other part thinks the world may just explode. I think the amount of reporter on athlete man-love there may be just too much for anyone or anything and it would bring about the apocalypse. And for the record, that is not how I want the world to end. Personally, I'd like to see the people from the "Whopper Freakout" ads maul some PETA folks and then overrun the world as BK keeps witholding Whoppers from them.

9) Jam scamming with Pebbles and the Freakin' Puerto Rican.

10) Drowning in a puddle of buffalo wing sauce and light beer while watching NOVA and listening to speed metal. (this is probably the most likely outcome)

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